Monsters change shapes and faces when we grow up. Adulthood comes with its own set of monsters that cease to reside under our bed. They take up spaces inside our heads, always instilling fear in us. Adulthood for women is fraught with perils both within and without. Paranoia is encouraged rather than cured in India. It's always better to be safe than sorry. Clichéd as it sounds, it is still the mantra every Indian girl stands by. Why? Because we are still afraid of monsters. Monsters who can harm us, both physically and emotionally. Monsters who can violate us, mute us and alter us. We fear the monsters on the road, at the market, in dark alleyways, schools, colleges and sometimes in our homes. Monsters have many faces. They live amongst us. They are our friends, colleagues and sometimes even related to us both by blood and by marriage.
Most part of our adult lives is spent worrying, being afraid and protecting ourselves. Have you ever wondered where women would be now if we had no monsters to worry about?
The worst kind of monsters are those that hide in plain sight. Talks like a good person, walks like a good person but violently abuses his partner. Gives to charity, cares for animals but molests small children. Is a loving father but treats his wife like property. Talks about women empowerment but wants his wife to serve him. Seems like a perfectly good person till he touches you inappropriately. We have all dealt with these monsters. We arm ourselves with pepper sprays and curfews to vanquish the demons. We try to stop them from harming us but never from existing at all.
Two most important things in India is religion and family. Why not spread the message of equality through them? Why not ask people to not turn into monsters? If religious leaders ask their followers to treat women as their equals, would they not follow? If every parent treats their sons and daughters the same, would the son still grow up thinking he is superior to the opposite sex? Can’t we stop the centuries of social conditioning with positive thought and learning? We can. However we choose to prevent rather than cure. We cover, we run, we cry out but never let the monster seed die. We admonish, we limit ourselves and we continue a struggle that is nothing more than a vicious cycle.
Stop. Think. Execute. And let it not Repeat.
